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5 Things 2016 Taught Us About Finding Love In 2017

You’ve been single for long, and want to know how to deal with it while you await a romantic partner to show up in 2017…You so need to read this!

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As much as 2016 had it’s incredible highs for many of us, it was also an ass sometimes.

It was also meant to be ‘season of the bae’, a friend of mine opined at the beginning. Of course the year would be pregnant with endless possibilities for blissful romance. The bae is in the bag baby!

Until he wasn’t.

And once it became clear that there was no one but stuff and red wine slips in the bag, it would also soon dawn on me that there was no one on Tinder either.

That epiphany hit me the first time the app informed me there was no one new around me anymore.  Imagine, ‘There’s no one around you.’ Deep.

So much for bae season…

The next phase of what we called the ‘Formation Tour’ involved turning our attention to that which is already around us. You know, the power of the here and Now? Maybe ‘the one’ is already ‘somewhere here’ – hidden in plain sight.

We are overthinking this whole thing. And indeed as they say, overthinking is the mother of all screw ups.

To summarise that chapter, I thought dude was here to steal my heart. But it’s my phone charger that went missing.

Although it’s pretty safe to say the 2016 leg of the Formation Tour has wrapped, not all is lost.

There’s a great deal we’ve learnt on this journey, and hope this list will help you get your groove back while you wait for babe to come through in your life. Don’t give up, the show goes on.

TRUST THE TIMING OF YOUR LIFE

Nobody wants to hear this one but often times things come in our lives a divine moments. It’s that whole ‘one day’ thing that can be awfully off putting if certainty is what you seek. And yet, things tend to have a way of working themselves out in the most surprising ways.

In an insightful Huffington Post piece called The 4 Rules of Divine Timing, Alexandra Harra points out that we can never manipulate time. Adding, “when you understand and use universal timing to your advantage, the wind is blowing from behind you, ushering you forward in the right direction.”

Spending too much worrying about things that are beyond our control can be source of much anxiety and stress. Whether you are single of happily swept off the market, living in the Now Moment and being one with what is is one of the most effective ways to achieving contentment.

Don’t spend your single days obsessing about whether or not you will finally find someone. It’s driving you crazy.

FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

Fraudulent depictions of romance and the dominant narrative of ‘happy ever after’ in mainstream media (and your Instagram timeline) are not only misleading at best, they also replicate notions of relationships as being compulsory.

It’s as if being single means you are lacking.

So we become ashamed of our self perceived inability to score blissful romance like other normal people. Often, we take being single to reflect negatively on our self worth, character and our attractiveness.

But the truth is – you don’t need someone else to bring you happiness or complete you.  You can live a meaningful and fulfilling life without a romantic partner. That being the worst case scenario, of course.

The focus should be on seeking a partner who will complement you, rather than someone who will fill some sort of void. Affirm your worth by yourself and claim your authentic power to fill your own life with happiness. And possibly, lots of great (safe) sex with or without someone else.

WORK ON YOURSELF

 

You can either spend the time dwelling on how much you dread being single – assuming a partner will make you happier – or you can live your life.

Being single can be quite empowering, explaining why an increasing number of people are single by choice.

Think of the autonomy to explore options without having to consult someone, the fewer social obligations, the opportunities to pursue adventures that we otherwise cannot when we are in serious relationships, opportunities to explore and discover our sexuality and more about ourselves.

Being single is what you make it. Rather than lament the loneliness, choose to use this time to be your best self!

CUT THE BS

Sometimes the whole process of meeting people we like can be filled with pointless games. You know you like someone, but the last thing on earth you intend to do is tell them.

I know friends who’ve struggled to find relationships for the longest times, but all potential ‘situations’ are met with resistance, doubt and fear. I’ve also been in that category.

Yes, we all get butterflies in the tummy when we have developed feelings for someone. But the difference between whether or not your are willing to take the plunge and disclose your feelings to someone can end your draught.

Cut the BS. Get to the point. If you have the hots someone, let them know. If they turn you down, move on. It’s life.

DON’T SETTLE

Don’t fall for the seductions of taking what’s available in the market because you’ve convinced yourself that ‘the pool has dried up’ for you. You deserve authentic, fulfilling love – not romping with back up plans. The problem with pressurising yourself to be in a relationship is that you find yourself obsessively trying to take matters into your own hands. You start being aware of your status as single so much that it starts defining your days. “My 4th Valentine’s single” syndrome.

How about we just try it out with that person who’s expressed some interest in you before you end up dying alone?

Don’t even think about it. Would you not rather wait for something exciting and worthwhile than try hectically to speed up a process that is not in your control?

 

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Squid Game Ending Explained; We’ve Been Scammed

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We’ve been had, and Squid Game is here to prove it.

When the end of the South Korean horror drama arrives on the ninth episode, the winner finds himself harrowed by what the coveted prize has cost his soul. In the rat race for survival, along with a better life that hinges on the never ending hustle, there’s no time to stop and see the horror our lives become. By the end, we see how the winner has sold his soul for a crappy deal that came with a few toys, and a happy meal.

A group of 456 players are mysteriously invited to take part in a set of children’s games for a grand prize of $38 million, which will be enough to give the winner the financial freedom they desperately need. The players are selected from different walks of life, with the burden of excessive debt being their biggest motivation to give the Game a go.

The first of deepening terrors comes during the first game, when the players discover that penalties for losing in the challenges will be death. DEATH. Horrified, the players initially vote to leave and return to their lives.

This noble departure doesn’t last long; their material realities as fugitives on the run from debt collectors only highlights the glow of the precious promise they’ve now left behind. When they return for the second time, they now consent to their highly probable deaths.

Led by Lee Jung-jae, who plays Seong Gi-hun, a taxi driver with a gambling addiction, the South Korean series has become somewhat of a global phenomenon. Now the most streamed Korean series of all time, Squid Game is also said to be on pace to dethrone Bridgerton as the most streamed series in the history of Netflix. And it’s with good reason. Squid Game is a trip.

Survival is the drive. The blues of a broke life pile up for Seong Gi-hun, who’s daughter is being taken away to the US by her mother and step father. His mother is battling deteriorating diabetes and even in her frail condition, is still working hard to make ends meet. It’s during the peak of his frustrations that Gi-hun is randomly invited to take part in the Game.

After accepting the offer, he finds himself in a discreet location along with 455 players, who are also drowning in debt. The players are kept under an authoritarian system of surveillance. Masked guards in pink suits keep the scene under control under the supervision of the Front Man. Gi-hun allies with other players, including his childhood friend Cho Sang-woo, as a the most strategic way to survive the bloody challenges.

Amongst those that end up in this team is player 001, a frail old man who who became his “gganbu”. Sae-byeok, who was also in the team, was killed by Sang-woo, Gi-hun’s childhood friend, team member and flip-flopping ally. Several other team members had to be killed by their team mates, which revealed the wickedness of the games.

In the end, Gi-hun’s victory came without an apology. He had to defeat a close ally in the games, the old and frail player 001. They’d bonded throughout their time, but in the end he had to advance himself against those he’d built alliances. As the games progressed, the players found themselves having to face tough calls. Someone else has to die for you to make it another day.

After a series of brutal games, it comes down to childhood friends Gi-hun and Cho Sang-woo. They’d played different games, with Sang-woo having played hard and stopping at nothing to win. Gi-hun is mad at Sang-woo for a series of betrayals, including him stabbing Sae-byeok to her death. In the end, Gi-hun wins when Sang-woo apologised and kills himself.

Yet despite emerging a winner, Gi-hun finds that the cost of becoming an overnight billionaire has bankrupted his soul. For a year following the day his bank account was loaded with a nine zero figure, he didn’t touch the money. After all, he returned to find his mother dead on the floor. One of his motivations was getting the money to get her medical help over her advancing diabetes.

THE ENDING

Gi-hun is clearly troubled by the bodies upon which his new wealth rests. A year passes and he hasn’t touched the money – even oddly reverting to old patterns of asking for loans to get by. It might be late to be so concerned about the moral questions surrounding the games now – the long and short of it is he won and his life has changed.

Later, he is shocked to find out that the “gganbu” who had to be killed after losing to him in a game of marbles, was never really killed.

In a shocking plot twist that changes everything – he also finds out that the old man is in fact the creator of the games! Finding him in a medical bed after receiving a mysterious invite to the location, Gi-hun discovers that the man’s real name is Oh Il-nam, an obscenely rich fella who created the games in 1988 (the same year Korea hosted the Olympics for the first time) purely for their entertainment. We already know by now that ‘the VIPs’ are a bunch of morally bankrupt elites who find pleasure in watching the poor masses slaughtering each other for money in a broken system. Where have we heard that before?

Although his participation in the games as player 001 was a farce, what he told Gi-hun back then, that he had a brain tumour, had been true. And of course, he challenged him to another sick game. A man had been freezing to death on a street pavement, and Oh Il-nam challenged Gi-hun to guess to bet on the odds that someone who help him when the clock strikes 00:00 at midnight. As Gi-hun wins, Oh Il-nam dies.

We assume this marks the end of the games. However later in the episode, Gi-hun sees the man who recruited him doing it to someone else. He runs to stop what is happening, but arrives at the exact scene late, the train has already taken off. Later on the way to boarding a flight, he turns and calls a number. “I can’t forgive you for everything you’re doing,” he tells ta man we assume to be In-ho. He turns back, clearly about to begin his new mission.

What we know now, is that Oh Il-nam created the games to tickle the sick tastes of his sick rich network. But he is now dead. Who is now behind the games? This, and Gi-hun’s passionate manifesto, are strong indications that next season of the series is already shaping up to a different arc. It’s his final transformation, and he is ready to take down the operation and those behind it. He won’t allow people to be “horses” for the entertainment of wealthy elites.

We know that In-ho shot Jun-ho in a bid to stop him from alerting the police about the games. The signal was bad, delaying the delivering of the evidence Jun-ho had been trying to send in several texts, right up to the moment the moment he plunged from a cliff and hit the water. What we don’t know is whether the messages were really not delivered. There’s also no conclusive evidence that Jun-ho is dead.

Potentially, the biggest lesson from season one is that our relentless pursuit for material success in a punishing money system kills us.

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First Look at HBO’s Game of Thrones Spin-Off ‘House of The Dragon’

DRACARYS!

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Things look promising for HBO’s upcoming drama series, The House of Dragon. The highly buzzed Games of Thrones prequel’s first visual teaser has been met with much fanfare, raking in more than 8,6 million views on Youtube within two days of its arrival.

The House of Dragon

Photo Credit: HBO via Twitter

First reactions and buzz around the epic teaser have been strong indications that the series, slated to premiere in 2022, is off to a good start despite the infamous final season slump suffered by G.O.T. And it could mean that maybe, just maybe,  the world ready to let old baggage go.

The House of Dragon, created by an entire different team, will arrive about three years since the cold winter. The cast includes Matt Smith, Paddy Considine and Sonoya Mizuno who will be bringing to life a different era of Westeros.

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Midnight Mass is Creepy With A Dark Subtext and You Need To See it

‘God’s angel’ had sinister plans for the town.

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The reign of terror plunges a small and quiet town to ashes when the arrival of a charismatic yet mysterious priest coincides with the return of a disgraced young man who has just been released from prison.

While Riley (Zach Gilford) initially finds that Crockett Island and its 127 residents – along with his childhood sweetheart Erin (Kate Siegel) – still conduct a mundane existence, Pastor Paul (Hamish Linklater) soon changes that.

Midnight Mass

“The LORD’s angel”‘s life giving blood comes scams locals into horrible mistakes on Midnight Mass.

When the island’s much loved Roman Catholic senior priest takes a trip to the pilgrimage and never comes back, an energetic new priest takes his place at the Holy Land church. And while his arrival brings with it a new wave of spiritual revival amongst the island community, something sinister begins to haunt the town.

With each episode, the esoteric occult that powers Paul’s ability to perform astounding miracles and mesmerise the islanders, slowly gains dominion over the unsuspecting community. Instead, they begin taking up a renewed interest in the church as word of mouth spreads about the signs and wonders. Much like Jesus Christ was able to draw crowds wherever he went, the appearance of Paul’s supernatural power is able to attract even those who’d remained sceptics their lives.

It’s the blending of the sacred and the sinister. The taking of communion that has been contaminated with demonic blood, which functions as the miracle drug promising eternal life.

We soon find out the miracles come at an unthinkable cost.

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