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The Devastating Effect of the Mirror: How the mirror is a figment of our Ideal-self

The mirror possesses an ability to show exactly what an individual would like to see in themselves. This perception is commonly irreconcilable with reality. Thus giving rise to millions of haters. Read more.

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In an age where confidence is everything, mirrors have assumed an exponential role in people’s lives. It is not to discredit other conceptions that explain peoples’ assumed self-worth and self-assurance; however the mirror is an indiscriminate property that is quite subjective and powerful. It is truly testament to the phrase beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. The mirror disguises asymmetries, highlights beauty and exposes how proud one can be. The mirror’s role in today’s society is one of a confidence booster. It has given rise to the existence of imaginary detractors, famously signified by the term ‘hater’.

Granted, an individual’s personal appearance ought not to be used as a tool for defamation or ostracism purposes. However in reality, one that consist of rational individuals who seek validation on account of others’ misery or downfall, peoples imperfections are subjected to heavy scrutiny. Queen B can attest!!!

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Beyoncé learnt the hard way. Her laugh lines and blemishes were exposed as photos from a 2013 L’Oreal shoot were leaked. Haters gon’ hate!

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Nevertheless one can see the extent to which perfection is dangled to the public. The final product is miles apart from reality. Since the mirror is an object without the ability to provide feedback, whether in the form of constructive criticism or objective counsel, a person’s appearance is only discerned by a biased perception. Thus, any attempt to offer critique of a certain selection of clothing may be met with unwarranted resentment and classified as an act of ‘hating’.

In a perfect world, one would champion the belief of self-acceptance grounded upon an internal locus of control where the society’s opinion about an individual’s appearance is given little to no interest. Conversely, the reality of the matter indicates that the society’s acceptance remains of chief importance to an individual’s self-worth. Indicative of this premise is how mimicry of fashion trends transcends once divisive labels such as age, weight and gender appropriateness. Thus self-confidence has been attached to the way one sees themselves in the mirror and a total disregard of what others may feel about one’s appearance. What is questionable about this approach is that comments made about one’s appearance tend to be filtered only if they are a scathing indictment. Acceptance and adulation of the way one looks on the other hand is not subjected to similar disregard.

As the mirror performs its role of reflection of ones perception about oneself, the rest of the society are left to occupy the role of hater. What may be perceived as a defence mechanism is an attitude adopted from western urban culture where one has no longer looks at perceived ill-will as a bad thing. On the contrary, one nowadays judges the success or failure of their endeavour according to the amount of ill will they generate from the public. The adoption of the phrase ‘bad publicity is good publicity’ to the daily lives of ordinary people is successfully operational. Did someone say DJ Sbu???

This in no way suppresses the very real existence of people sworn to make others feel disenfranchised by virtue of their blemishes, however it is to say that not every comment about one’s appearance is meant to be used as a weapon to bring them down. Consequently, the fault lies with the mirror. This indiscriminate object whose magic power is to stroke the ego allows for greater emphasis to be placed on appearances and therefore offer an avenue for ones self-confidence to either be built or crushed. This result is unavoidable irrespective of whether it is self-imposed or not. In this way it is advisable that one resists the temptation of believing the hype the mirror creates, subscribe to a more internal locus of control and accept constructive criticism. Not everyone is your HATER!

Fashion

Nomzamo Mbatha Inspiring More Women’s Stories with PUMA

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Nomzamo Mbatha PUMA Do You campaign

This young generation of driven and bold South Africans is really something else. Nomzamo Mbatha – the trailblazing actress and activist who covered Cosmopolitan Magazine’s Activism issue – is really something else.

It’s now just days after that awe-inspiring interview with Pearl Modiadie on Zaziwa, where she laid bare scars from her past, and we are still here keeping an eye on her #DoYou video anthem, on which she partnered with PUMA.

Launched on this past National Women’s Day, the clip features three young South African women whose personal messages of perseverance and self-empowerment resonate with the celebrity.

The anthem video is the culmination of a project launched on International Women’s Day 8 March 2018, when Nomzamo took to Instagram to invite young women to share their #DoYou stories via social media, to stand a chance of becoming part of a global PUMA platform to inspire young women to become confident, motivated, and uncompromising in every aspect of their lives.

Nomzamo Mbatha PUMA

Inspired by their stories, Nomzamo invited Chumani Mtshixa, Thembakazi Silevana and Yonela Mabi to spend the day with her on the set of the PUMA South Africa’s seasonal Do You photoshoot in Johannesburg.

RELATED: NOMZAMO MBATHA SNATCHING IN FIERCE PUMA SLIDES 

“Nomzamo not only inspires me but she gives me permission to ‘do me’; to do anything that my heart and mind desires,” says Chumani Mtshixa, a Politics and Social science student from Cape Town. “The whole day was amazing. I thought it was just a dream!”

Thembakazi Silevana, a production assistant from Johannesburg, says: “Nomzamo has been an inspiration in my life as she is the epitome of hard work and resilience. The words of encouragement she gave us will forever be in my heart.”

Nomzamo Mbatha PUMA DO You Campaign

“Nomzamo inspires me to do me the best way I know how,” says final year BA student Yonela Mabi from Port Elizabeth. “She is breaking the so called ‘glass ceiling’ that women are said to be limited by. She’s bold, she is a powerhouse and she gets things done.”

RELATED: ELECTRONIC BUSHMAN ANATII ON HIS HUSTLE WITH PUMA RUN THE STREETS 

“I was inspired by these women’s fearlessness and deep authenticity in relaying their stories. One of our common threads as human beings is our ability to overcome, and the women I chose displayed that trait incredibly,” says Nomzamo.

“Every young woman deserves to have someone on her side, who is going to believe in her and blow the wind beneath her wings just a little harder. I am grateful to be in a position where I can provide them with a platform to share their incredible stories.”

“Do You” has been a vehicle of female empowerment for the past two 2 years and Nomzamo joined other PUMA ambassadors including professional basketball player, Skylar Diggins-Smith and Lauren Lovette, New York City Ballet principal dancer and choreographer, in announcing their #DoYou Passion Projects earlier this year.

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5 Affirming Life & Career Lessons From Khanyi During Her Talk With Anele

How does she do it!? Khanyi Dhlomo recently sat down with Anele Mdoda to discuss life, business and spirituality. Here are some 5 really punchy life and career lessons we will keep forever from that inspiring conversation.

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Ndalo Media founder and CEO Khanyi Dhlomo is one of the most inspirational women on the planet.

An overachiever in her professional career and business, Khanyi was an SABC prime time news anchor at just 20 years old, before becoming a True Love Magazine Editor at the tender age 22.

Some folks at QuenchSA were getting down to Pour It Up at that age.

Now one of the continent’s most successful businesswomen, Khanyi Dhlomo joined Anele Mdoda on Real Talk With Anele to discuss business, life and career.

Here’s a look at 5 life lessons we got that from that incredibly affirming conversation:

‘You don’t have to know the how, but you need to know the what.’ 

Adding, “the universe will move everything around you to create the how.” Often times, we get caught up in figuring out the specifics on how exactly are we to make things happen. Unfortunately, sometimes there is little evidence to support the realistic feasibility of the visions we have for ourselves. That, amongst many other odds we see belying possibility, sometimes digs up a bottomless pit of self doubt.

For Khanyi, moving with the flow of your life and being mindful of where it is you want to be is a good place to be. Things will fall in place!

‘Sometimes your dreams don’t come to you packaged the way you expect.’ 

While Khanyi knew since she was a young girl that she had intentions of one day working in the magazine industry, a world that intrigued and excited her so much even from early on, she could have never known some of the plot twists that placed her in a position to swallow her pride in the beginning, and be a ‘skivvy’, before she earned becoming True Love magazine’s youngest Editor at just 22 years old.

Khanyi’s first step into print industry came clad as a fashion assistant job with duties that included serving coffee to everyone and doing all the running around. Far from the glamourous world most sometimes think magazines are, she was taken aback by this.

However, as she would later learn, it turned out to be the preparation she needed to be able to step up to the next level of her career!

“It was the best preparation for owning the media company that I own now.”

“Our lives are all about the next level.”

And perhaps because of such experiences, Khanyi has learned that nothing in life is a waste, good or bad. She affirms that everything in life is meant to happen so that we may grow and move towards the direction of our purpose. Every level in our lives brings with it everything we need to go through to be able to move to the next level.

There is no next level without this level. So don’t be hard on yourself. Wherever you want to be, will unfold from where you are in the Now moment.

‘Come from a place of love.’ 

She says that at our core, we are all perfect beings. Mistakes may be made at the physical level, but the belief in the essential goodness of others is consistently actioned through kind acts of compassion in human interactions and how she approaches life.

‘Solve a particular need.’ 

Replying to a viewer’s question on what life lesson she has learned so far in business, Dhlomo urges entrepreneurs to understand what problem they are solving. Wanting independence is not enough to want to pursue and be able to stay in business. You want to be able to positively impact lives, because that “aligns you with the creative energy that governs everything that we are.”

In addition to being passionate, development, progress and moving things forward should be central to any approach to business.

 


Photo Credit: YouTube

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Celeb News

South Africa’s 5 Most Inspiring Celebrities – Youth Edition 2017!

From a TV personality with more than 5 television shows airing at the same time, to a self made digital media mogul, here’s 5 young SA celebs who are serving life inspo goals right now

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June marks Youth Month in South Africa, as we reflect on the brave acts of the 1976 youth who went out on the 16th of June that year to protest against unfair laws that enforced Afrikaans as compulsory in black township schools nationally.

500 youths were killed on that day.

But while the national holiday is a time we should all take to remember their brave acts against an evil system, it’s also an opportunity to shine a light on South African youth who are smashing down doors and inspiring young people to rise to the best expression of themselves.

And as we do every year, let’s take a look at young people making big and bold moves in South African showbiz.

TREVOR NOAH 

He’s only 33 years old, but Trevor Noah has already lived out his wildest dreams. The comedian and The Daily Show host recently beat out the likes of Ellen DeGeneres and RuPaul to snatch the gong for Favourite TV Host at the 2017 MTV Movie & TV Awards. Then there’s the penthouse in Manhattan, the TIME cover… let’s not drag this on too much – you already know the deal with Trevz and history making ways…

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DJ BLACK COFFEE 

DJ Black features on Drake’s latest mixtape More Life. He also has, amongst other collaborative efforts we’ve seen emerge with international acts, worked with the likes of Alicia Keys.

He has a residency in Ibiza, Spain, this coming summer. Black Coffee will be jetting off to Ibiza to start rocking out Saturdays at Hï Ibiza as part of his first ever residency, from June 30th until September 30th. Read more of that HERE

Undoubtedly the highest paid DJ in the continent, DJ Black Coffee spends a lot of time playing for crowds around the world, and introducing them to the African house music sound.

READ: 10 HIGHEST EARNING SOUTH AFRICAN CELEBRITIES 

DJ SBU

DJ Sbu has accumulated so many titles throughout his massively successful career it’s not easy to pin him down to just one thing. Yet the 38 year old ‘Billionaire Under Construction’ , as his book is titled, proves with every unpredictable move that he knows no limits for himself.

Real name Sbusiso Leope, the multi skilled big dreamer has done everything from Radio to TV presenting and churning out multi platinum albums.

And just when many thought he’d reached the pinnacle of his success, the Thembisa bred entrepreneur moved on to retail business – starting his own energy beverage business – MoFaya. Just before releasing his book, Sbu announced that he will be launching his very own online radio station.

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TBO TOUCH 

Tbo Touch smashed many hearts when he announced his departure from Metro FM mid 2016, despite being paid over R2 million for his radio presenting duties at the controversial SABC radio station. Back then, most were not aware that Touch had been getting ready for the launch of his own online radio station Touch HD (formerly known as ‘Touch Central’)

Following a reported R28 million upgrade of the successful radio station, Touch roped in some of the biggest names in SA radio, including former Metro FM colleague Glen Lewis, who left the station after 22 years to join Touch HD.

Shooting this MEGA show on top of #TouchHD offices #whatatimetobealive

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CASSPER NYOVEST 

Cassper Nyovest’s latest album, Thuto, went Gold within a day, and then hit platinum in less than a month after being released. Tito Mboweni, the album’s lead single, tallied a million views in less than two weeks on YouTube, becoming the fastest South African music video to reach a million views over there.

Thuto also hit a 1 million streams on iTunes in a week. All of that came just days after announcing brand ambassadorship duties with Ciroc, which happened weeks after the Family Tree record label founder launched his merchandise store in Newtown, Johannesburg.

Most recently, the 26 year old rapper’s 2016 history making Fill Up The Dome Concert was availed for premium streaming on NetFlix.

There’s a lot happening in his career, each accomplishment more impressive than the previous. His highly anticipated concert at FNB Stadium, the biggest arena in Africa, will likely top everything else on his 2017 To-Do’s.

BONANG MATHEBA

Ever slay ready Queen B branded 2017 ‘The Year of the Queen’, and no wonder!

The media personality, fashion icon, face of Revlon and cognac brand Courvoisierbusinesswoman – with her own lingerie line at SA retailer Woolworths, has two TV show premiering on two different channels this July.

Being Bonang, a reality show chronicling the busy B’s life debuts on VUZU AMP (co-produced by her production company Bonang Matheba Entertainment) around the same time that the KFC Taste Kitchen, a cooking show she will be hosting on Mzansi Magic, will both appear on the telly at the same time.

The two shows are mere additions to Bonang’s ongoing television gigs as she is currently a presenter on Top Billing and Afternoon Express (SABC 3). All red carpets that matter also keep her trotting around for coverage, thanks to her red carpet shows on E! Entertainment.

A post shared by Bonang Matheba (@bonang_m) on

Just on TV alone, she reigns supreme.

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